Real Healing Doesn’t Come from Pretending Nothing Happened

 

NARCISSISTS expect everything to go back to normal, as if their actions left no scars.
They act confused by your distance, offended by your boundaries, and impatient with your healing — as though the harm they caused should simply disappear with time.

They invalidate your pain, minimize your experience, and reframe the damage as a “misunderstanding” or an overreaction. They rush the timeline, pressure you to move on, and shame you for remembering what hurt you in the first place.

They want peace without accountability.
Forgiveness without change.
Access without growth.

What they call “moving forward” is really just returning to a version of the relationship where they never have to face themselves. But real healing doesn’t come from pretending nothing happened — it comes from truth, responsibility, and consistent change.

And when those things are missing, your refusal to go back to “normal” isn’t bitterness.
It’s self-respect.